This might also be a column topic, so if you see this again, don't be surprised.
Why do people feel the need to ask personal, potentially sensitive questions, and legitimately expect answers? What questions, you ask? Well, I personally think that questions about marriage and children should be off limits, i.e. . . . "When are you planning on settling down?" or "When are you guys going to have kids?" Here's the thing . . . you never know what someone's predicament is. Even if you're close. What if a person was engaged and their fiance passed away, or what if they've been trying for years to have kids and can't, for whatever reason? Who are we to insert ourselves into their lives and demand answers to questions about their personal decisions or circumstances?
For example, I'm not really excited about the idea of having children. Okay, so maybe it's a little stronger than that -- I don't want to have any. I have Godchildren that I spend time with and love dearly, but as far as anything deeper is concerned, I just don't think it's for me. There are people who have the ability and desire to be fantastic parents, and I'm not one of those people (which is really way more justification than I need to provide). The other day, after being asked if I was a biological timeclock victim, I shared my decision, and the person somehow felt the need to chastise me about my decision and then became upset with me about it. I don't think I have to say that the convo quickly went on a downward spiral to purgatory.
The point is . . . are we no longer being taught sensitivity? As a child I was scolded for asking unwarranted personal questions, and was persuaded to back off when it was clear that someone was uncomfortable with certain topics. Have we forgotten our boundaries? Or did some of us never have any? Hmmmm
Ranted by Gina B. @ 5:22 PM
Monday, July 28, 2003
It's been a while. I guess I haven't had anything to rant about since last week.
My week hasn't been that eventful, which is a good thing. I got carded buying cigarettes, which was hilarious. And no, I don't smoke. I was buying them for one of my honorary aunts -- an old friend of the family. I had my hair in two ponytails and I was wearing overall shorts and no makeup, which I guess made me look like a child. Truthfully, I suspect that the cashier could have been blind in one, or both eyes. Either that or she just wanted to make me feel good. She was pretty persistent about it, though. When I laughed uproariously after she asked for my ID, she raised the brow above her one good eye. I showed her my ID, and she squinted (with that same eye) and looked at me in disbelief. Anticipating her skepticism I asked her why an underaged person would have a fake ID that said she was in her 30s. She reluctantly handed me the pack of cigarettes, which I should never have agreed to buying in the first place.
I'm the worst kind of non-smoker -- the self righteous ex-smoker. I smoked for 8 years and quit several years ago, so it's hard for anyone, including myself, to ever believe I had a pack a day habit. Yep, I smoked roughly 20 cigarettes a day, which, when I think about it, I don't know how I even had TIME to smoke that much. I never thought that smoking affected my stamina until I was in dance class several years ago and realized that I was wheezing, which was MAJORLY unacceptable in my 20s. So, I quit that day after my manicure appointment. And then I proceeded to have a nervous breakdown for the next two weeks as I trained myself to be repulsed by anything having to do with cigarettes. Not fun, but no more wheezing.
So now, what this means is that I hate being around smoke, hate smoky bars, can't date men who smoke, and refuse to allow smoke in my house or car. And I can't believe I ever thought it was a good idea. I guess it wasn't.
What I don't understand, to save my life, is how there are so many smoking teenagers. Back when I started, sure, it was linked to lung cancer, but now, society makes it so difficult to smoke. Who thinks it's a good idea to begin that habit now? I don't get it? Particularly now that it's so expensive! If cigarettes had been $5 a pack when I started, my habit would never have gotten off the ground. It would have been a choice between smoking and eating, and I love pizza WAY too much!
Ranted by Gina B. @ 9:49 AM
My week hasn't been that eventful, which is a good thing. I got carded buying cigarettes, which was hilarious. And no, I don't smoke. I was buying them for one of my honorary aunts -- an old friend of the family. I had my hair in two ponytails and I was wearing overall shorts and no makeup, which I guess made me look like a child. Truthfully, I suspect that the cashier could have been blind in one, or both eyes. Either that or she just wanted to make me feel good. She was pretty persistent about it, though. When I laughed uproariously after she asked for my ID, she raised the brow above her one good eye. I showed her my ID, and she squinted (with that same eye) and looked at me in disbelief. Anticipating her skepticism I asked her why an underaged person would have a fake ID that said she was in her 30s. She reluctantly handed me the pack of cigarettes, which I should never have agreed to buying in the first place.
I'm the worst kind of non-smoker -- the self righteous ex-smoker. I smoked for 8 years and quit several years ago, so it's hard for anyone, including myself, to ever believe I had a pack a day habit. Yep, I smoked roughly 20 cigarettes a day, which, when I think about it, I don't know how I even had TIME to smoke that much. I never thought that smoking affected my stamina until I was in dance class several years ago and realized that I was wheezing, which was MAJORLY unacceptable in my 20s. So, I quit that day after my manicure appointment. And then I proceeded to have a nervous breakdown for the next two weeks as I trained myself to be repulsed by anything having to do with cigarettes. Not fun, but no more wheezing.
So now, what this means is that I hate being around smoke, hate smoky bars, can't date men who smoke, and refuse to allow smoke in my house or car. And I can't believe I ever thought it was a good idea. I guess it wasn't.
What I don't understand, to save my life, is how there are so many smoking teenagers. Back when I started, sure, it was linked to lung cancer, but now, society makes it so difficult to smoke. Who thinks it's a good idea to begin that habit now? I don't get it? Particularly now that it's so expensive! If cigarettes had been $5 a pack when I started, my habit would never have gotten off the ground. It would have been a choice between smoking and eating, and I love pizza WAY too much!
